Over the holigays there are two types of people: cuffed and un-cuffed. If you are one of the many un-cuffed and ready to date, then there may be some…logistics that we have to navigate through. Do you want to date over the holidays, but not have “the talk” with your family? Want to go on dates, but feel weird about doing it in your hometown? We know, we’ve been there. Let’s figure out how to get through dating over the holidays.
- Headed home? Have your talking points ready
Whether you are out or in the closet, you know that you will have at least one family member be in your business. Why are you wearing that? How is work? And it continues. But then that one person will ask about your dating life. If you aren’t out, this is a great time to point out the amazing things that are happening in your life, while casually responding with “I don’t have time right now”, “there’s no pressure for me to date, I’m happy doing me” or “it’s just too much over the holidays, no thanks”. Doesn’t allow for continued convo, and you can keep it moving without breaking a sweat. If you are out, take this from Emma Watson and let them know you are self-partnered. Boom.
- Swiper be careful swiping
Most family members will be looking over your shoulder while you are on your cell phone. Be aware of who is around you if you aren’t open about your sexuality or dating life. If you don’t mind, then just make sure you aren’t taking too much time away from your family to swipe. Don’t spend all your time trying to figure out if that one classmate you always wondered was queer will show up in the HER App – save that for bed time.
- Don’t be afraid to date
There are so many people that shut down dating between November to March so that they don’t have to deal with extra stress and pressure around the holidays. If you are going to date, do it, but set boundaries. Make it a time to get to know them, their family life, traditions, and more. If you do want to give a gift, make it considerate about the time that you’ve spent together so far, without any pressure for one in return. Don’t make it all about you.
- Give it time
The holidays are lots of family time, friends time, office parties, things that expect a plus 1 to participate in. But if you just started dating, you may not want to bring this person into your spaces yet, and that is totally fine. Make sure you are communicating with each other about schedules and what you would like. Also, understanding that you all may not have as much time together because of these commitments. Carve out time to see each other, but don’t pressure each other for too much time.
At the end of the day it is all about communication, patience and enjoying your holiday season. Don’t let someone else come in and spoil it when it’s supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year.