My first lesbian bar experience ended with a girls hand down the front of my trousers.
Dark corners + loud music + too many drunk people to care what’s happening = sexy club fun times. Obviously this was reciprocated but as first experiences go, it was a pretty good one.
The night itself however was nerve-wracking. It was my first trip to a lesbian bar since coming out. Considering that was only 2 years ago, it was kind of a big step for me. I’m not saying that I’d never been to a gay or lesbian bar before, but I was going now with an acceptance of who I was and knew EXACTLY what I wanted (hands down trousers wasn’t exactly that, but hey, it wasn’t something I was going to turn down either). I was a wide-eyed baby dyke who got a pretty explicit education that night, and maybe that was the thrill of it for the other girl. It’s not necessarily everyone’s idea of a good first time but it makes one of the better “first-time” stories in my friend group, that’s for sure!
It also made me more aware that the “scene” can be really intimidating when you’re first coming out and going in. I’ve told that I can come off as a little off-putting in terms of how I act when out with friends and can come across as a little bit cold or uninterested. But if I’m out with friends and there is someone alone, we’re usually the first to welcome them into the fold. It’s nice to think that you may be making someone else’s first time that little bit easier and welcoming.
The lesbian club/bar scene is slowly but surely improving. Yes, there are places out there and we all know this but there is still a long way to go until the “lesbian” spaces can truly rival the “gay” ones. Luckily, I’m managing to now make friends with the lezzers in charge of these, so keeping my finger on the pulse is proving to be easier than ever!
Not so sadly, my dirty club days are over. I still engage in a cheeky snog every now and then but I’m now at the stage where a frenetic dance routine to Beyonce or Girls Aloud is enough to keep me satisfied and everyone else in the place amused. And the next time you see two girls snogging in a dark corner, raise your glass; they’re probably having the time of their life.
Jackie is the kind of lesbian who likes knitting in pubs, music festivals and bringing her Running Man moves to the dancefloor on a regular basis. Even in heels (success rates vary). Find Jackie at Beatrix & Alabama and over on Twitter @BeatrixAlabama