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Femme Lesbian Meaning

Robyn Exton

Feb 29, 2020

Femme Lesbian Meaning

A “femme lesbian” is a lesbian with a more feminine-leaning style or energy. They are the one in the relationship who might wear a dress to a wedding and actually knows how to walk in heels (even if they’re just kitten heels). But they also look hot in a suit. As our definition of gender evolves, so does our understanding of what “femme” looks like.

A femme lesbian is a lesbian who is more feminine-leaning in style and energy. They actually know how to walk in heels even if it’s just kitten heels. 

“Femme” is typically viewed as the opposite of “butch,” which is a more masculine-leaning lesbian. Some femme iconography includes long hair, septum piercings, strong brows, face masks, good perfume, too many rings, socks with sandals, thin necklaces, glasses, top buns, and lip gloss.

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While a femme is more likely to go for a butch or a stud (a butch Black or Latinx person), femme for femme is also super common. And nowadays, femme iconography is evolving. Someone could have a shaved head but possess femme energy. They could also be the top in bed, build the furniture, and have acrylics. The possibilities are endless! 

There are all kinds of femmes! So don’t box yourself in. And if you do, make sure it’s a Tiffany’s box. 


  • Learn more about lesbian dating and how to connect with queer women and open-minded folks.

Robyn Exton

Robyn is the CEO & Founder of HER. Find her on Twitter.

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