Blog Post

Learning Lesbian: Androgyny

Let’s be honest, the world of sex, sexuality, gender and everything else can be super confusing sometimes.  Getting the words right, asking the awkward questions, being able to admit that you just don’t know something – it’s tough, so to help you get a grip on some of the trickier aspects of sexuality, Effi Mai has created an A-Z guide of what people do with their bits and pieces in the bedroom. Or kitchen.  Or on the sofa watching EastEnders.

A is for Androgyny

Androgyny is the combination of masculine and feminine characteristics. That is, you don’t have to look like a girl with a sparkly pink tutu and a ribbon in your long hair, and you don’t have to look like a boy with a football tshirt on holding a beer. Everyone will usually land somewhere in the middle and the androgynous look is very common in the LGBTQ community with people wanting to avoid labels.
Talking to a close friend Alex, who calls herself androgynous, she explained the pros and cons of it. “You appeal to a big audience,’ she told me, ‘Gay girls, straight girls, gay men, straight men, and they are all potentially attracted to you, for personal reasons.’
Sexual ambiguity can be found everywhere from fashion and looks, to gender and sexual identity. Alex prefers not to identify as anything specific stating ‘I like to strive for equality and I guess being androgynous I’d like to think makes it difficult to put me into a specific category.’
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On the lesbian scene things are changing massively, even in the year I’ve been here. I used to get at least two comments on why I, a straight girl wearing heels and having long hair, was in a lesbian bar. It’s get a bit tiresome to explain that I’m simply a gay girl in wearing a unicorn dress just wanting to down my tequilas in peace. Now the word Queer has almost taken over with girls wanting to express themselves in different ways and whether you turn up in androgynous attire or whether you flounce in in dressed as a tooth fairy, it’s all getting much more accepting.
Personally I love the androgynous look and find it very hot. Give me girl with short hair without a care in the world and I will help her out of her chinos any day. Alex says apart from dealing with sexism and it being a little bit of issue when going to the bathroom, the look is part of her and she loves it. She hates that we have to pigeon hole ourselves to satisfy others. ‘A lot of life is ticking a box, straight, gay, bi or male or female, I prefer to tick “other.”’
Want to share your feelings on being androgynous?  Leave a comment and join the discussion.