Robyn is the CEO & Founder of HER. Find her on Twitter.
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Feb 27, 2020
The more the queer community says “f*ck you” to the gender binary, the more terms like “lipstick lesbian” become a thing of the past. When we hear “lipstick lesbian” we immediately think of Carol. A lipstick lesbian is a gay woman who would choose high heels over Birkenstocks. They’d pick a nice red matte lipstick over a quick swipe of Burt’s Bees. They’ve probably gone camping, but only because their soft butch girlfriend dragged them up a mountain — and they made sure there’d be indoor plumbing and a mirror nearby.
A lipstick lesbian is generally the hyper-femme (lipstick-wearing) one in a gay relationship. See also: skincare lesbian.
Originally, the term “lipstick lesbian” was born from the idea that all lesbians look a certain way. For example, we all wear cargo pants with a carabiner full of keys clipped onto us. We don’t believe in shaving or wearing makeup or being nice to cis men. While some of those things might be true for some lesbians, it’s not the case for all of us.
Nowadays, there are all kinds of lesbians! Some who are butch but wear lipstick. Some who are femme but can build you a house. As gay and straight women continue to redefine what it means to be a woman, the lesbian world is becoming an even bigger and more diverse place.
A 2020 version of a lipstick lesbian might be a “skincare lesbian” They’re the type of queer woman who has a 26-step nightly skincare routine. They want to hang out in the shade when you go to the beach and insist on being asleep by 7:30 — with a silk eye mask on. They’ll often pick moisturizing over sex. Meanwhile, their partner’s personal care routine consists solely of a tub of Working Hands.
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Robyn is the CEO & Founder of HER. Find her on Twitter.