Robyn is the CEO & Founder of HER. Find her on Twitter.
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Dec 15, 2023
Do you know what turns many people on? Porn that expands the boundaries of sexual representation, subverts stereotypes about women’s pleasure, depicts diverse bodies and desires, and views sexuality through an anti-oppression framework. And also porn that is very soft and tender and makes me blush.
If you’re reading this and thinking, well, that doesn’t sound like the porn I know, let me tell you where to find it! There are tons of people making super gay, super sexy porn. And you should support the queer sex workers who are creating art for fellow sapphic women. There are plenty of them, and they face an uphill battle to hold their own creative freedom and produce content that avoids the male gaze.
Getting to know the adult entertainment industry will teach you a lot about the world, and it makes good porn sexier. We want to get into the types of porn that women are actually interested in and, most importantly, learn how to spot ethically produced adult entertainment.
“Sex workers are constantly fighting against silencing, de-platforming, and criminalization, all while being able to get you off.”
Noelle Perdue, writer and former sex worker
“If you’ve jerked off to even one piece of hot content in your life, you should care about the livelihood and freedoms of sex workers.”
Noelle Perdue, writer and former sex worker
Here are frameworks to think about how women consume porn and how to find ethically-produced erotica, as well as some recommendations for women- and queer-owned sites.
Cum along for the journey!
The reality is that many women watch porn. For people who experience sexual attraction and desire, porn is one of many ways to explore what turns them on.
While there is not enough research on porn consumption in general, it appears that women’s consumption of porn has been steadily on the rise. According to Pornhub’s 2022 Year in Review, women made up 36% of viewers on the site, and the top category across the board is consistently “lesbian.” (Take this data with a grain of salt, of course — and yes, you are paying for Pornhub with your data.)
Why do so many women, including straight women, watch lesbian porn? According to sex therapist Wendasha Jenkins Hall, the male gaze is more challenging to shake in mainstream heterosexual porn.
“Simply put, lesbian porn — especially porn produced by women or femme-identifying people — centers female pleasure.”
Wendasha Jenkins Hall
She said in a 2021 article in Women’s Health. There is more focus on clitoral stimulation, which is often notably absent in straight porn, despite the fact that over a third of women need this to climax.
So we can share our sapphic porn with straight women. This is a safe, sexy space.
But it’s telling that there isn’t much more information about women’s consumption of porn beyond, “What?! Women watch porn???” and “OMG they all watch the gay stuff!” Even the data is pissing me off with its male gaze. But that’s why you should talk to your friends and partners about what turns them on, whether it is porn, their own sexual fantasies, or something else. Open the conversation to discuss your desires without judgment.
There is a vast world of porn created by queer people that exemplifies radical labor practices and is out to destroy the heteropatriarchy as we know it. Many of our most brilliant LGBTQIA+ organizers, activists, and artists are sex workers, and we can thank them for so much of the sexual freedom and joy we have today.
However, I don’t want to gloss over how profoundly bad unethical porn can be and urge you to take the time to find other options. Videos of nonconsensual sex dominate lots of internet porn. It profits off of violent racist stereotypes while actively shadowbanning and robbing Black and brown creators. Executives have made no effort to protect sex trafficking victims when they absolutely could do something tomorrow.
I say this because you cannot look the other way.
Engaging with the porn industry, following artists, and keeping up with news about it is your duty as a consumer. Where we are made to watch our masturbation material in shame, quickly closing the browser, we are creating a shadow industry where sex workers are alone in advocating for their rights. When I, a beloved television watcher, follow and post about the Hollywood strikes, I tell the industry that their bad behavior has consequences. Without this same attention, the porn industry can operate with impunity.
So here are some starting points to look for ethical porn.
If you want high-quality porn for queer women, open your wallet! It’s less than your Netflix subscription. Paying porn creators directly or through a trusted website allows them to continue their work on their own terms.
Nothing is free under capitalism. You might not notice it, but you are paying for porn somehow, at the cost of your privacy or someone else’s autonomy.
While you won’t find it on the homepage of popular porn sites, there is a treasure trove of porn created by women for women. There are, in fact, a lot of queer women in the industry who are making porn just for us if we are willing to find it.
And don’t just watch the videos. Follow the creators and learn about their worlds. It makes the porn even better when you get to know them.
Once you have your subscription, go crazy! Learn about your desires! Tell your friends!
Seeing women have real orgasms is just the tip of the iceberg. Think of a feminist porn site and an extensive sexy library. Whatever you like that’s out there is good for you.
“Feminist porn” as a category is often used to identify erotica for women, but it’s worth digging a little deeper to make sure there’s no pink-washing going on behind the scenes of the sites you find.
Here are some recommendations for ethical porn created by women and/or queer folks to get started.
Crash Pad is one of the best-regarded queer porn sites, and it’s earned this reputation for ethical porn for 15 years.
The videos take place in a San Francisco apartment where queer performers visit to live out their hot, gay fantasies. The series has over 360 episodes and is currently directed by Ava LaPrima.
If you want a model for what transparency in pay, consent, casting, and sexual health would look like for porn, just take one look at their homepage and see how mainstream porn has no excuse.
Subscriptions start at a $25 monthly membership or a yearly membership that works out to $9.99 monthly.
Gender Flux, previously known as Dyked Down, is a great site for professionally shot scenes with tattooed hotties of all genders.
Nikki Hearts started the studio with 12 years of experience under their belt. In an interview with Noelle Purdue, Hearts said that straight and queer porn are “like two different planets.”
Subscriptions for the AdultPrime network start at 9.99 per month.
PinkLabel.TV is an adult entertainment network founded by Shine Louise Houston, also the founder of Crash Pad. The site has its own videos and studios, and hosts a wide variety of queer creators. The tagline for PinkLabel is “Porn with Good Taste,” aiming to offer diverse adult films for people of different sizes, races, ages, kinks, genders, and sexualities.
Some PinkLabel creators to follow: Carnegie Velvet, Xenon Universe, and Jiz Lee.
Bellesa Films has free and subscription videos, all produced and directed by women. You might know them for their sex toys as well from Bellesa Boutique. It is also a good site to find “sensual porn” if your kink is tenderness.
From their website: “We unwaveringly believe that if we can change the kind of sex that people are watching, we can change a whole lot more.”
Audio porn is one of the growing categories of adult entertainment among women.
Dipsea is a woman-owned audio-erotica app with many excellent stories to turn you on. There are lots of featured queer artists on the app, including trans actress Trace Lysette and E. R. Fightmaster.
“Sex is as mental as it is physical.”
Co-founder Gina Gutierrez
“We wanted to hear stories that felt like they were made for us.”
Co-founder Gina Gutierrez
Subscriptions are $69.99 for a year with a 7-day free trial.
Softcore porn encompasses a lot of the sex scenes you’ve probably seen on TV. In the porn industry, this is frontal nudity with no visible bumping fronts. But especially if you are interested in tender sex scenes with storylines, why not masturbate to your favorite shows?
So if you see me rewatching “The L Word,” “Vida,” or “Lip Service,” mind your business.
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We are powerful as consumers, we are powerful as queer people, and we are powerful in our desires. Exploring your sexuality can be a magical experience, rather than filled with guilt and shame, and that includes how we consume porn.
So what are you waiting for? Open a private browser and get yourself or your partner(s) off already!
Robyn is the CEO & Founder of HER. Find her on Twitter.
