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Queer GenZ singles have #CoupleGoals

Robyn Exton

Feb 08, 2023

Queer GenZ singles have #CoupleGoals
  • With Valentine’s Day lingering just a couple of weeks away, we at HER were curious about how our users felt about the day of love and what their overall vibe on relationships is. 

    About our data: We ran two surveys with our users in mid and late January with a total sample size of 2,442 participants. 

    The results: Our results paint a surprisingly sweet picture around attitudes towards love, non-monogamy and of course Valentine’s Day.

    Valentine’s Day Data ReportThe goodies

    • Gen Z Loves LOVE! Of the 18-24-year-olds surveyed 39% said their favorite thing about Valentine’s Day was Love–making them the most romantic queer gen interviewed. 
    • Valentine’s Day for single queers represents an idyllic relationship goal with 83% of participants saying they want to spend the day with a date or significant other.
    • Spending VDAY with a partner is a HIGH priority for 18-24 year-olds – 3 points higher than any other generation
    • Divorced queers are on the prowl! Especially the 35+ age group on HER who were surveyed (19% of 35+ aged folks surveyed are divorced)
    • Queers are collecting partners like they collect Pokemon cards as they get older–with 19% of the 35+ age group identifying as non-monogamous (compared to GenZ at 10% and millennials at 14%)
    • Almost ⅓  of users surveyed would be ‘open to either’ monogamy or non-monogamy in their next relationship
      • All three age groups basically showed equal interest 
    • GenZ is more optimistic about nonmonogamy, even though they have tried it less than other age groups – Less than 14% of GenZ participants surveyed have tried nonmonogamy, with 49% stating that they are open to trying it.
    • All generations agree that non-monogamy feels queer, not straight
    • All generations agree that non-monogamous people are better communicators, but that doesn’t make them better partners
    • Polyamory was the most explored form of non-monogamy that we asked users about. (And more likely to have been tried by the time you’re 30)
    • Monogamish is losing visibility with younger generations, perhaps “situationship” is taking over?
    • Date night is popular at any age, and one of the most popular forms of Valentine’s Day quality time. 37% of GenZ users surveyed are eager to go out on the 14th.
    • Compared to pre-pandemic: People are already solidifying plans for where they want to go / what they want to do multiple weeks out from VDAY (versus a few days before)
      • ⅓ of survey respondents are keen to stay home and celebrate this year
    • Even though most folks on HER are currently seeking partners, attitudes towards Valentine’s Day are very positive: 45.6% of 18-24 people commented positively, similar with Millenials. It was the 35+ folks have less positive views on the day.


    Queers are excited to spend this Valentine’s Day with a partner or date and have already started planning. This is THE most important thing to GenZ who are just a bunch of optimistic softies and love celebrating love. More people than ever before are potentially interested in their next relationship being non-monogamous, with GenZ being the most willing without having tried it. The queers agree that non-monogamy is more of an “us thing”, not a straight thing, with almost 20% of the 35+ age group identifying as non-monogamous.

    Robyn Exton

    Robyn is the CEO & Founder of HER. Find her on Twitter.

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