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Tea with Auntie: You've Been Played

Jun 12, 2019

Tea with Auntie is a bi-weekly advice segment. Have questions you want Auntie to answer? Share your questions here:

Went on my first date, its been several years. I orchestrated the date, to include all the things that make HER happy/her faves. I finally asked HER on a date, after eight years of platonic “hanging out” dates. I rented her dream car (Lincoln Nautilus) to pick her up in and the (Campagna T-Rex) to cruise the strip. Chilled for the evening, at her fave place (beach, fave spot), grilled her fave meal (she loves my cooking), gave her special gifts (duration of the date) – Finale: lady bug, heart shapes, ground bloomers, and wheelie fireworks; also Chinese sky lanterns filled with affirmations (I read to her – mostly whispered in HER ear) that I wrote on rose petals and explained that I was releasing/speaking how I feel about her into the universe. We danced to her faves (via personal playlist). The night ended very, very well; we shared confessions, expectations, spooning, kisses, and a little petting. Drove her to work in the morning and haven’t heard from her since. Absolutely nothing! I waited 36 hours before trying to call HER again, after calling several times that day. What do you think could be going on? Did I do too much too soon? Should I do anything else or leave the next move on HER? Was it an overkill? – AunyCya, 50

Auntie: I already need a second cup for this tea you just spilt. I just want to point out the initial – 8 YEARS OF “hanging out” DATES. Honey, no. After 8 years, this incredibly thought out date should have been a proposal. It sounds like she was into it, but I think she realized that this could’ve been a proposal aspect too. What kept it from moving into something years sooner? Why all of a sudden was this the “first date”? What made you decide to go all out for this occasion? Right now I have more questions than answers. Clearly something was off, and maybe they truly weren’t ready for any commitment – hence the ghosting. That’s the best answer Auntie has, because just reading that made me tired!

If any of the rest of you wonderful community members have any thoughts, post them in the comments.

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