Blog Post

Soft Butch Meaning

Like the little Downy bear, we just want to rub a soft butch all over us. “Soft butch” refers to a lesbian or queer woman who isn’t quite a butch, but isn’t quite a femme either. They fall somewhere on the butch spectrum. They like to button their button-downs all the way up, and maybe even add some collar jewelry every now and then. They tend to have gorgeous eyes, nice lips, and just be really hot in general tbh. 

A soft butch is a slightly more feminine (or “softer”) version of a butch lesbian. They’re tough but tender — like the perfect chicken nugget. 

Abutch lesbian is typically defined by their swagger. It’s style choices, sure, like always wearing boots with cuffed jeans or lots of rings, but it’s also a certain je ne sais quoi that only a butch would understand. A “soft butch” is essentially a toned down or “softened” version of this swagger. If a butch lesbian exudes sex, a soft butch exudes sex with some crying after. 

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How is a “soft butch” different from “butch”?

Soft butch energy is someone who will top you and then make you a cup of tea. It’s someone who will build you a piece of furniture while talking about their mommy issues. They’re usually good cooks who also know a lot about astrology. They are more chapstick lesbians than lipstick lesbians — although playing by strict gender rules is not really a soft butch’s thing (or any queer woman’s tbh.) They get manicures but only choose a top coat. They’ll always offer to drive, even if they’re bad at it. 

Soft butches are tough but tender, like a perfect chicken nugget. Only, a chicken nugget who knows how to use a strap

This is part of our official queer glossary – check it out!