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Tea with Auntie: Late in Life Coming Out

Apr 18, 2019

So…I’m recently embracing that I am bisexual with a very strong attraction toward beautiful women. I am still exploring, which is why I joined HER. I have never been with a woman and even though I want to I’m scared and confused and well…in love with someone and that complicates it even more for me. I have 4 children and 3 1/2 grandchildren 🙂❤️ I have a big family and am scared to death to come out. I know for certain that there are a few family members who would NOT be accepting of me being bisexual. Also the stereotypes and attitudes that exist in the world around homosexuality, all of that scares me. I do know that the only way I would come out is if I met someone that I have the same feelings for as I do for the woman I fell in love with already! I’d jump out of the closet for her!! ❤️ She is ALL I think about and everything I’ve ever wanted in a person. She’s beautiful inside and out and helped me to turn my life around and I miss her so much! So, I’ve been living with this secret for over two years and am not sure how or if I can move forward with anyone else. I am asking, what is your best advice and what can I do to overcome this dilemma? I want to meet someone but I’m not sure how to sort this all out! Thanks for your time and I’m ready to hear what you think, good or bad. 💕

Auntie: Phew, I’m going to need a whole new cup of tea to dive into this. Although I see your questions you asked at the end, it sounds like there are some other “dilemmas” that you also want to address – so let’s break this down.
1. You are in love with someone, but at the end you say you miss them. Do you still have contact? Or is it the typical story of ‘they are straight’? Going to guess the latter and say that you can’t hold on to this love if it’s not going to happen. Even though you are late in life coming out, not too late to get through the hurdle that we all do, falling in love with straight women. Think of the qualities you enjoyed with this person and take that moving forward when looking for a woman to date.
2. While coming out is absolutely terrifying at times, especially when you know how some family members feel, the bonus is you are a grown ass woman. Your children have no say over your life, and your grandchildren will probably not think twice about it (the children are our future). And anyone else that has something to say, you can give them your best Mom face – you know the one, where they know not to pry any longer and keep it moving.
3. Proud of you for jumping on the app to explore, that’s already a huge first step. When meeting people, you know what activities you like to do – now just make it gay and find those meetup groups who do the same. This could be a great bonding time for you and your grandchildren (if they are in the double digits and tech savvy) as they can help you find events. Pride is around the corner, go check it out and talk to people in the crowd – everyone is friendly.
Overall, you’ve come this far in showing your true colors (pun intended) don’t wait to continue on this journey for yourself.

But those are just some suggestions – let’s hear the opinions of the Community.

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