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Where to go on a first date with your queer match: 8 original ideas

Robyn Exton

Aug 13, 2019

Where to go on a first date with your queer match: 8 original ideas

You’ve done it! You made it to the point that you are taking someone out on a first date. This moment is exactly what you’ve been waiting for…until you realize you have no idea where to go on a first date. 

When choosing a venue to meet your new person, there’s no reason to panic because we’ve got three tips to help transform your stress to impress your new person. And if you’re still clueless after reading our tips, take a page from our list of clever and original first-date ideas for queer folks.

The best first date ideas are personalized 

Now before you close your eyes and pick at random from our list of perfect date spots for your queer outing, you might want to be mindful and choose something that will really resonate with your new person. This is why we say that the best first dates are personalized. Follow our following three tips that will maybe help you arrive at a perfect date idea all on your own.

Tip #1: Check their whole profile – not just the photos – for date idea inspo

Maybe you haven’t gotten to the point of discussing actionable interests (aka interests that can turn into a date) and that’s ok. This is what the first date is for. 

Check out their photos, text, and (if you were talking on HER) their fun facts

Do they drink, climb, or like to be outside? These are like cliff notes to the person so that you can pick something that both of you will enjoy.

Tip #2: Consider travel when choosing a perfect first date itinerary

Are you driving? Is public transportation involved? These are important questions to think about when choosing a location. The easier to get to, the better.

But if you know that someone will have to travel a bit further, be sure to make it worth their while to go out of their way to meet you.

Tip #3: Pick three choices and narrow them down to one

This is the best way to avoid the pressure of deciding what to do and having it go terribly wrong. By picking three options and then sending them to your date, this can be a fun problem to solve for each of you. Even if it is a game of “pick one to get rid of and then I’ll surprise you, ” it is a great start to this potential relationship and a way to make this person smile.

And those are your three steps to successfully decide on a first date. 

Are you still having trouble deciding on an epic first-date idea? We have some creative ideas for you to check out. just keep reading! 

Queer date ideas you and your date will actually love

The point of a first date is to get to know your dating partner(s) better. So choose wisely: you want to stay safe, so going to a public setting is always a good idea. But depending on your own level of tolerance to stimuli and noise, you might want to choose a calmer environment. 

Another good rule of thumb is to choose something that will allow you to interact and engage with your date. 

This means that going to the movies may not be the best option for a first date, but if you’re both huge movie buffs and are excited about it, who are we to stop you?

Read on for more date ideas!

The classic museum date — with a twist


And you have to get a sweet treat after !!! Key step !

♬ Chopin Nocturne No. 2 Piano Mono – moshimo sound design

We’re not the first to say “Go to a museum!” as a date idea. That being said, we love thinking outside of the box, and TikTok user @notwildin – known on the platform for giving dating advice – has a great spin on the classic museum date

Here’s the twist: say you’re more of the type to take your time at each art piece, reading the object labels and reveling in the emotions the piece makes you feel. Or maybe you’re more of the type to walk quickly through galleries and stop only at the pieces that speak to you. 

That’s a recipe for awkwardness when it’s the first date, and you both take museum exploration at different paces. 

TikTok user @notwildin has a great solution: arrive at the museum and set a timer for 30 minutes. During those 30 minutes, you will explore the museum alone and at your own pace. The goal is to choose one art piece that speaks to you during this time. When the timer ends, meet your date at a designated spot and bring them to your chosen art piece. Tell them about it. Why did you choose it? Did it remind you of something from your childhood? Did it make you think about a long-distance friend? A beloved pet? 

This TikTok user turned the classic museum date into a real treat! Try it out next time you go to the museum! 

A woman smiles looking at food on the table as she goes on a food crawl with her queer date.

Go on a food crawl to your favorite restaurants

This is for our foodies out there. Choose four to five restaurants within reasonable distance of each other, and spend an afternoon picking and sharing meals from each of these restaurants. 

If it’s your own hometown and your date is from out of town, pick from your favorite restaurants and tell them your favorite memories from these places. If you’re both natives of the city, mix, and match both of your favorite restaurants. You’ll learn a lot about each other by the end of the crawl!

Dine at home and prepare something your date dislikes (yes, you read that right)

This one is quite advanced, but hear us out! 

If you love cooking – and we mean love – find out what food your date dislikes and prepare the food in a way you think might change their mind

This might take some research on different ways to prepare a specific food, but it might be a fun challenge if you like cooking! 

For example, if your match dislikes aubergine, try to find a really good, well-rated aubergine recipe prepared in a way your date has never tried before. Replicate this recipe and see if your match approves or disapproves. You never know. You might end up changing your date’s mind! 

Of course, if it doesn’t end well, have a backup planned: takeout is always an option! 

Always proceed with caution: going over someone’s home may not be something you’re comfortable with if it’s a first date, but you can always prepare the food and bring it to a park to try together! 

Go see a queer movie at the cinema

Take your queer match to see Bottoms, a lesbian sex comedy movie, as a great first date idea. Promotional poster seen here.

Source: MGM 

We’ve been so lucky in recent years with more and more queer media hitting the big screen. One of the latest laughs to hit the cinema is the queer coming-of-age film Bottoms. If messy sex comedies are your speed, bring your date to check it out. 

If you’re more into action or sci-fi, check out the listings at your local theater to see what else is showing.

The library for a quiet, cute date idea

This is not the first time we’ve mentioned the library as an awesome queer date idea. It’s not only a nice and calm environment, but it’s also a great cheap date idea

Similar to our museum date idea with a twist, you can take 30 minutes to browse books and choose ones that speak to you. After the allotted time, bring back your chosen books and exchange arguments for which one should be the next one you both read. This way, you can start an impromptu book club!

A woman carrying a grocery basket shop in a store, a mundane but cute first date idea.

Go grocery shopping together

Sometimes mundane daily tasks could be the cutest date idea. After all, sometimes people love keeping each other company, so why not invite them to the grocery store? 

Let’s say you’ve got a really busy week, but you really want to meet someone to go on a date finally. Learn more about your date through grocery shopping. What’s their thought process? What’s their favorite go-to snack? How do they stock their pantry? This is a low-stakes, chill date that will bring spice to a regular activity.

Have fun in a forest obstacle course

If you’re more of an active type of couple, of course, you could go for the more classic options of activities: biking, hiking, etc. But what about a forest obstacle course?  

In some cities and towns, you can find local obstacle courses that last anywhere from one hour to three. Pick your course, and bring your date along! 

Get creative at the park 

This could be any kind of park. But sometimes you can keep it simple and go to a kid’s playground when it’s a calm time of day, and there aren’t as many kids around. Break out chalk with your date. Start making street art, take a few rounds on the swing, and let your inner child break free! Who says adulting can’t be fun? 

Robyn Exton

Robyn is the CEO & Founder of HER. Find her on Twitter.

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