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Finding my Therapist as a Queer Womxn of Color

May 30, 2019

The day I found my therapist was one of the best things that could ever happen. Typical right? But it seriously was. Let me take you through this journey, because for all the research and cursing that happened, I couldn’t be happier with the result.

When I was initially looking I had a simple checklist:
1. Was female identified
2. Identified as LGBTQ+ or had worked with LGBTQ+ clients
3. Also a person of color

Not too much to ask, right? Wrong. I felt like I was on another dating app. Reaching out to see if they were available, interviewing to match their experience with their website profile, doing a quick phone call to see if they were real and if we were a fit to continue seeing each other. My encouragement for these moments are:
1. Look them up on multiple channels. The reviews on their website need to correspond with other pages
2. Get suggestions from friends who love their therapists or ask places that don’t work if they have other offices that they could refer you too. They are genuinely here for your well-being, so don’t feel awkward about it
3. Have a list of questions you want to ask, and go through all of them. Mine included previous experience, discussion style, understanding of the LGBTQ+ community and (of course) logistics
4. If it doesn’t feel right on that initial phone call, trust your gut

There were definitely some hard passes and “maybe we can be friends” moments, but never followed up. Then finally that day came, when I got to speak to a soft spoken, but fierce, woman who has been my therapist for the last 4 months. In many cases, it is definitely a marathon to find an in person therapist to see, but worth it in the end.

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